Dark Spirits
31 May, 2009 | 16 comments | Category: I.dentity, Senduq- Semhal, madness!, nostalgia.personal, prose.tales, thinking...
by Semhal
My parents and siblings have had more effect on my development as an individual than any other experiences in my life. My mother’s stoicism and generosity & my father’s devotion to his work and to his family have allowed me to view the world in a way that I would scarcely dare.
My father’s sacrifices and sufferings especially stimulate me to wake up every morning with a positive spirit. Although my father never had the opportunity to go to college, he has always had the wisdom to understand the workings of the Universe. When no one else knew how I felt, and when I can’t foist my distress on my friends … you know one of those days where practically nothing happens your way and you feel overwhelmingly discouraged or betrayed, he understood the reasons.
“This is what the world sometimes is… dark spirits …but you should never let it make you bitter or depressed ” he says. He told me how Mother Theresa suffered from this for decades of her life. When I have my dark spirit days, I am obsessively agitated, restless, impatient, mean and I spend too much money shopping…oh the lengths I used to go to resist the calls of my dark spirits! These obsessions are often born out of avoidance. Whenever there is something else looming that I don’t want to think about or deal with or don’t know the answer of, I sink in to my obsessions: I feed them and cloth them without understanding their purpose, cause or origin.
It is my father who helped me understand that my dark spirits are the hammers that shape me …they are what make me who I am. Without them, I cannot understand and appreciate the joy of living. He says the only way you can overcome life’s darkness is through love, forgiveness, and hope. These are things you could give and share for free and repeatedly. Although they may not diminish your pain all the way, they will surely bring you a sense of its value.
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. – Kahlil Gibran
Possibly Related Posts:
- Flattery: Fast-tracking Success?
- Opposite Sides of the Border
- Murky
- Words & Incense
- Let’s vote off the Cravat!
16 comments to “Dark Spirits”
Sofi, June 1st, 2009 at 8:46 am:
-
So true!! “the only way you can overcome life’s darkness is through love, forgiveness, and hope” profound truth!! Sometimes it’s so easy to view life as nothing but a rat race, devoid of all pleasure and sense or higher meaning besides survival…the only way we can get a sense of it’s true value and a deep appreciation of what it is and what it can become is through these dark days.
Semhal, it feels like you’ve been in my head!!
tsedey, June 1st, 2009 at 7:42 pm:
-
such an honest post. I like Kahlil Gibran too
On the contrary, am a confrontational person- if anything bothers me i got to resolve it or face it, then i feel better whether it works out or not but i can’t pass things/avoid them. In short, am impatient.
Semhal, June 1st, 2009 at 11:04 pm:
-
Thanks sofi…am glad am not alone.
Tsedey that’s an excellent quality to have….to face your issues. I try to deal with my issues but when i don’t want to face the truth (subconsciensly) i find myself avoiding the situation and i try to deal and be happy just by changing my circumstances…but circumstances can’t set you free…only the truth sets you free:)
tsedey, June 1st, 2009 at 11:36 pm:
-
u know Semhal- it depends on how u look at it. In order for somethings to be resolved it has to be two way esp. when it comes to interpersonal r/ps. So no matter how much i confront the issue,if the other person uses avoidance and/or afraid to face the issue, it still won’t resolve it but i feel free- like u said, the truth will set u free. The downside to it is, if it can’t be resolved, it eats me inside and i can’t cover it or change circumstances and be okay as I can’t run away from my concscience. Even if i go out for shopping, i will be shopping but still be thinking about the issue- u know what i mean?
Semhal, June 1st, 2009 at 11:48 pm:
-
We are on the same page:) It’s a sucky feeling…specially if it involves another person, b/ce like u said it takes both to set things rite. Or one can do most of the work and be the better person if the situation allows it…if it doesn’t you forgive and move on…rite?
Nani, June 3rd, 2009 at 6:05 am:
-
Love this post!
… and all the comments esp. “it takes both to set things rite. Or one can do most of the work and be the better person if the situation allows it…if it doesn’t you forgive and move on…rite?” verry true!
I think there are times when you have to face the truth and times when you have to avoid, sometimes willingly, sometimes not, it depends on the situation … and interpersonal relationships can be the toughest as there are people and feelings involved … the Milln $$ question would be when d’u know to face up to it and to avoid it … you never do, you just have to do things with the best intentions at heart, however way others may take it Thanks for sharing
tsedey, June 3rd, 2009 at 5:46 pm:
-
yes, i agree u can easily forgive and forget and move on.. but with a note to the other person why u are letting this go and they should learn from it.
nani, when u kno the answer to the mil $ question, please let me know
Nani, June 3rd, 2009 at 8:46 pm:
-
Yes, a very important point – letting the other person know why u’re letting go, IF they’re willing to learn from it, sometimes it takes time and they may not be ready
and tsedey I do have the answer to the Mlln $ Question
– you don’t know! LOL – to be honest I doubt I ever will
Sam, June 4th, 2009 at 6:22 pm:
-
Remember…the serenity prayer….your aunt had it hanging on her wall for the past 17 years, even though she never knew read it:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.
Tamrat, June 7th, 2009 at 6:37 am:
-
This a very interesting post. I’m new to this website but I’m definitely gonna be a fan after this.
mimi, June 7th, 2009 at 1:00 pm:
-
You are one of those few luckey ones who has “yegebaw” father. You know most of us are lost in the middle of nowhere, when facing challenges or are in despair, or so forth, not knowing that we really need those difficult situations to shape us.
I love the post, keep it up girl
Semhal, June 7th, 2009 at 9:47 pm:
-
Tamrat and mimi…thank you guys. I feel really blessed to have my dad in my life and I’m glad i can share his wisdom.
Sam ..i absolutely love that prayer…thanks for sharing
Nani..please elaborate the milli$ Q…:PPP
Nani, June 14th, 2009 at 6:11 am:
-
LOL the Million $$ question Ms Semhal is that you never actually know how to handle situations, when to face things or not
Sophistifly, June 16th, 2009 at 11:14 pm:
-
I know that feeling and it’s as if I know that story…it’s all too familiar. Thank you for that.
DrEthiopia, June 29th, 2009 at 9:20 pm:
-
Spend too much money shopping??? LOL. Sounds like people who indulge in all foods junkie, when they are depressed.
It has been a while since i have paid visit to Senduq. Would love to say hello to Tpeace while i’m at it.
Good read.
Semhal, July 1st, 2009 at 12:00 am:
-
No Dr. Ethiopia…i think depression is a lil too strong (what kinda doctor diagnoses from a blog anyway:)
People indulge in d/t things: We ALL have guilty “passions” …if we didn’t, we’ll be perfect. So, I think the point im trying to make is that Joy (not circumstantial happiness) cannot be achieved by feeding your deamons but by dealing with them appropriately : love , forgivness and hope are some ways you can achieve Joy…